Gay Dating (1): Finding a Loving Male Partner to Marry

The Gay Marriage: Finding a Loving Male Partner to Marry

Sex without love wouldn't satisfy you for more than 15 minutes and love without sex wouldn't satisfy you at all. So how do you find both in the same man? That was the question I left you within a previous article.

A friend of mine is a life insurance broker. He always says that there is only 1 rule for survival in sales and that is to see people, see people, and see people. It's a numbers game. Of all the people you are going to see only between 2 and 10% will buy from you, so the more you see, the better your sales. Meeting people is exactly the same; the more people you meet, the better your chance of meeting the right person. Luckily there are a few possibilities for meeting new people.

The older guys (read: even older than I am) tell us that they didn't have gay clubs, bars, or dating services so they had to refine their gaydar and flirting skills. The fact is that those skills are still just as valuable today as they were years ago. Another important skill is taking it one step at a time. Two types of guys never end up with a perfect match; those who fly off in a second, and those who never come out of the starting block. The guys that fly off are proposing marriage before they even know the other guy, and those in the starting blocks only stare evening in an evening out.

If you are a flyer you need to relax. Look for friends instead of possible partners. Nothing is a bigger turn-off than a guy who hits on you after he has tried everybody else on his way to your table. Friendly people have a few good friends, many acquaintances, and 2 or 3 possible people they could be interested in. Guys who try to fly into serious relationships have no friends, one or two acquaintances, and the whole city as possible people they are interested in. The important thing you should learn from this is that you start by meeting lots of people, you will find a few very good friends among them, and in time you will meet somebody you are really interested in. Flyers always run the risk of getting heartbroken on a weekly basis. You can never keep up with who they are in love with - it changes every time you see them, and every month or two they try you yet again. That is when you decide to ignore them completely.

The guys who never take off are almost in the same position. They see a possibility every night, but they are too scared to do anything about it. They look a bit weird if they stand in a corner ogling everybody so you ignore them as well. They have a few acquaintances that turn into friends because they normally end up in a group of seekers - waiting for something that never happens. If you are in such a group get out and start building your self-esteem. If you do not think that you are good enough as a partner, nobody else will believe in you either.

With that in your mind go back to the gay clubs, gay bars, dating sites, and the gay section of your local bookstore - start by making friends, being a good friend, and enjoying friendship for its own rewards. Stay away from the friend zone - that is the ogling bunch in the corner. You will do fine.